I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
