Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize