YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
