And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
