This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
