Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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