My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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