I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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