party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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