Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize