belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
