She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
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