Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
