Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Im part way to drunk.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I had to cum in my sink.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
