You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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