I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
