He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
