You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
a search helicopter?!
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
