Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
