We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize