I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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