Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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