he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
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