I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I would fuck him just for his dog
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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