State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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