Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
