I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
