ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
