I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Randomize
