it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Randomize
