he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
