I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
