So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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