it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Congratulations! We have a period
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
