you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
