i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
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