Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
