Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
