That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize