How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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