Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
