I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
