Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Randomize
