Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Randomize