I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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