Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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