Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
It's rum buckets o'clock
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
