I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
