We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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