she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
