how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Randomize
