she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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